No pictures please

We all have skeletons in our closet. I don't care who you are you have something to hide. One of mine is about 5'10 and 300 lbs. My sister and I never really got along. Not even as kids. She was always a little off and I'm not saying she was slow or ate cat food, she just always looked empty. Six years ago she created a crime that changed the entire dynamic of our family and permanently changed my view on her. I haven't spoken to her since and honestly don't ever care to again. So whats the point of me sharing all of this? After not speaking for so long and not seeing each other what do you think the chances of us living about a mile apart are. Pretty god damn good apparently. It makes me sad and furious to think that after the short amount of time she did in prison and therapy she is out on the streets again. I just think the entire system is really shitty right now. How could they let her out? Okay rant over, moving on.

Today I didn't have the time to make it to the gym amid all the crap I had to wade thru so I decided to take advantage of the fitness channel we have. I closed all the curtains oh so tight before I started so as not to blind any innocent eyes. About half way thru the lung thrust I suprised myself by starting to sweat. Oh yes, real sweat and a lot of it. How could it be that flopping around in the comfort of my own home could create a downpour equal to that of the gym. It's too bad I don't have kitchen curtains because I bet it would be great to do in underpants.

I found some pictures today. Before pictures. I was really fat. Theres no way around it. Rolls hangin everywhere. So I haven't quite figured out how some bloggers find the courage to post them. I have come to accept my body and my journey but really aren't those before pictures best used in the bottom of a litter box somewhere? Maybe I will feel differently when I can proudly claim my goal. Speaking of which I am getting closer and closer. What am I going to obsess over then? I tried knitting and that was just a horrible experiment. Scrapbooking is way to uh something for me, and I'm just kind of stuck on what to do. Maybe a belly dancing class would distract me. That sounds fun I think I'll look into the community center options.

My son is the very important person of the week at school. Apparently its a huge honor because he gets to be first in line for everything and even had a poster made in his honor. I wonder why we don't have vip days as adults. I want a week where I don't have to fight for a parking spot, or deal with assholes at the post office. Actually I would be happy to have a week off from doing dishes.

Today I had to run into the store to pick up some milk and cereal. I ran in really quickly and grabbed my kashi and organic milk and headed towards the front of the store. I quickly realised that I had come on the worst possible day to step foot into winco. It was food stamp day and I was surrounded by carts overflowing with microwave pizzas and bbq wings. Children and moms were screaming at each other and it almost made me give up. I looked for the shortest line and jumped in behind a lady with four kids and a cart full of frozen dinners. When I say full I mean FULL. I lost count at 40. I'm so glad my tax dollars are paying for all that. I'm also glad my tax dollars pay for all those damn kids, and OH so happy that you will always be a welfare leech until you are upgraded to a disability leech. And then to top it off I hear complaints of having hard times. Heres an idea. Get a job. Close your legs. Buy your kids some clothes that aren't covered in snot. Not that it frustrates me or anything.