Fessing up

I'm pretty sure I've put some weight back on. As a matter of fact I have never been as sure of anything in my life. My pants no longer want to fit my body and as much as I would like to say they must have shrunk in the wash I know they didn't. Add into that the fact that pcos and diet has a lot to do with egg quality and it has motivated me once again to get my ass in gear. I'm tracking with fitday and I'm rather embarassed to say I've had 1600 calories so far and its only 1:31 in the afternoon. And today I haven't eaten as much as I have been lately. I suck.



I can blame it on the fact that I have been in a mild depression since the miscarriage because that is true, but still just an excuse. I know that shoveling down mass amounts of sugar is not going to help the cause, if anything it will make it worse. Being as we are all lined up for iui I think I need to really redo my eating habits right away. I feel like an idiot because all I was doing was making it harder for myself. Add into that my nonexistant exercise routine and its easy to see how I backslid. I'm not going to use a scale or anything, I'll just be happy when my pants fit again.

I should at some point come up with a name for my other half so I can just stop refering to him as husband, but for now it will do. Anyway the husband and I had a talk last night about our willingness to move forward and what it really ment for us. Oh yes, it was plan making time. I needed a solid comitment in order for all the little voices in my head to stop screaming and feel confident in what we are about to take under. We looked at the financial part of it and once our hearts started beating again we decided this is in fact a road we do want to do. So here is our plan.



This month will probably be a cycle with just the femara because I will not be in town around O date and that would make iui very difficult, also I really want to get my body back in order

Next 5-6 cycles iui with dr. mik

If we aren't successful we plan on moving on to ivf next summer (this is the part of the finances that gave us heart attacks)



We've looked everything over and think its a good plan. We have insurance that covers most of the iui expenses but for ivf we would be on our own. I've heard of shared risk programs and will look into them when the time is ready. So for now I will just plug away, but knowing that my husband is as commited to this as I am makes me feel a lot better.


My sons fish died yesterday. I felt awful having to tell him but once the tears dried we replaced said fish and all seems to be better. I really hate these damn fish but they were a gift so there they sit in the tank in the living room watching me with those creepy bubble eyes all day. Ugh