I'm not sure if it is the weather or what but I feel stuck. I've been sitting here for what seems forever just staring at the screen. My husband told me over coffee the other morning he still thinks of the baby we lost. Its funny because when we were in the trenches he was the one encouraging me to get over it, and now he's the one that can't seem to. Maybe miscarriage is what is making me stall on moving forward with the entire trying for a baby thing again. I'm not sure my heart can take it again. As a matter of fact I'm pretty sure it can't. My appointment with my ob/gyn is soon and I know this is something that will be coming up. I think she will push the medicated IUI route again and I'm not ready. I know I keep going back and forth but its hard because I just want to enjoy B right now. I just want to hold him and smell him and listen to him laugh. I don't want to think about pills and blood test and speculums. Everyone is pressuring us right now and I just want to scream and pull my hair out. I'm also worried my husband truly won't be happy with just being a family of four. I know we need to have a long talk and put it all out on the table but we are working through so much already. Its just all so mind consuming.
I've been a bad commentor. I've been reading, just too crappy headed to respond.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
I am sorry. I wish it could just be different
As for hte carseat a baby website had the britax decatholon on sale for hte roundabout price. So i bought that
I'm sorry.
i've been fighting myself for months about whether or not to see an RE. now that i did something i can actually sleep again.
i hope you and your dh talked. or that he did something irritating that distracted you for a moment.
((hugs)
I can't iimagine what it'd be like to have gone through all this, finally made it to the other side, only to have to think of doing it all over again. I've sworn we'll only do it once cuz I can't imagine coming back, but once I'm there... who knows. Ugh.
Just stopping in to say that I am thinking about you and hope that you and the husband are able to come to a decision about everything together.
And to the people that are pressuring you...tell them to get a life!
That's tough. Good thoughts coming your way.
Post a Comment