Poppers

I think my knee hates me. Since I started my journey of fitness it has steadily been getting worse. So I started running 3x a week and biking 2x and just doing whatever I feel like the other 2. Biking seems to be okay but after I run I notice that it sucks a lot. When I lookes up my pain and symptoms it said it was jumpers knee, but how can you get that running. Is my fat just simply too much for my knee? Now I know I promised to go have it looked at last month, but now I'm really ready. My fear is that they will tell me no more exercise. I"m not really ready to blow back up like a jelly fish at the moment so I keep putting it off. But I will call tomorrow and make an appointment.

Today I decided to break out of my usual routine and took my son up to Mt. Tabor so he could workout with me. Hiking up and down that damn place with intervals of jumping jacks and kicks was harder than I thought. It was slightly embarassing that my 6 year old excelled more than me, but still good to get outside. Since I started the rule of no tv and no video games during the school week I have seen an amazing difference in the way he acts at school and at home, but I have to be honest when I say that sometimes it is hell of a lot easier to let them have their way. Tonight about 6:30 I would have rather chewed my own leg off than play another game of shape sort. I was proud of myself when I pulled thru, but believe me in the back of my head I had visions of blues clues and relaxation.

So today being the total idiot I am I started the next rule of no candy or soda on school nights except special occasions. For some kids it is okay but I think if my son even smells a sprite he can't sleep until a few hours past his bed time. I decided to start making changes in his life when I started to turn mine around, but decided to do it slowly. He has done fabulous and I couldn't be happier.

I was thinking about love earlier. Not the kind of love I thought I had when I was younger and thought about marriage to the wrong guy, not the kind of love I thought I had when I got pregnant, and definetly not the kind I imagined in my head when I was young. I'm talking about the kind of love that catches you off gaurd. The kind you feel when you lay next to your husband and talk about plans for vacations or anything really. The kind you feel when you hold your kids hand and talk about the school day. I never ever thought I would be capable of such love. Its just hard to remember that everyday when alarms go off late, laundry gets forgotten, your husband has bad gas and doesn't warn you, or a you picasso decides to make the hall walls into his own personal art space. As much as I complain sometimes about trivial things don't be fooled. I am so blessed and I know it.