Ugh

Hello hello hello. Today is cycle day 24 and I am resisting the urge to pee on every stick I see. Now I know how dogs feel. All I can say is that I hope things worked and if not then we are thinking about taking the next step, whatever that might be. Anyway I'm not going to think about it. very much.....

I have to say that I have been saddened lately by the city I live in. I don't live in a wealthy part of town or in the middle of the city. I am a burb dweller. I live in an ordinary house on an ordinary street where people work hard and the men pass beers thru the fence on saturdays and talk about "souping" up their mowers. We have a nice little existance here. I garden on a regular basis to make our yard look beautiful, my husband does all the needed repairs, just like everyone else on the block. And then I started to see them. You know, the meth addicts. They can usually be identified by the marks on their face, sunken in cheeks and the inability to stand still or focus their eyes. And there they were. On the way to the grocery store, in line at the bank, behind me at the doughnut shop. I understand that portland is a huge meth mecca, but it just became real to me.

So in the spirit of keeping my neighborhood clean I will make this warning to all meth heads in my neighborhood

• NO I will not spare any change
• I do not have any "spare" metal to give you
• I will get a better alarm for my car so you cannot steal it
• I will tell my son not to talk to you
• I won't let you sit on my property for a "rest"
• I am not stupid and will not fall for your scams
• Go ahead, build a lab in our neighborhood and I (and everyone else) will be there with torches ready to burn it down

Its not that I don't have compassion. I do. If you want help great. I can point you in the right direction cause I have been there, but I will not let tweekers fester around me. END. OF. STORY.

On a happier note it has been beautiful lately. Not that my son would know because he has been in his room for almost three days. Yes I feed him and bathe him and all that good stuff, but until his room is clean there is no fun :(. I know that makes me mean. Go ahead, fill my email box with complaints. But I believe at this age he should be able to do it on his own. And he can and usually does. Lately he has just gotten into the entire "you can't make me" thing. And hes right. I can't make him. But I can make his life miserable until he does. He didn't even bat an eye when I took the tv away! Anyway I'm just babbeling now.